This week has been a tough one, I’m not going to lie. Kirsty has been very unwell and following a series of misleading information by health are professionals she ended up in hospital, which is where she needed to be from day one. I won’t go into the in’s and out’s but it was so horrible to see her like that. Seeing the person you love curled in a ball unable to move because of pain is heart breaking. I may not have shown it at the time but it made me feel so sad. Sad to the point that I had a breakdown whilst taking M to my mums’ one morning.
I’m not a very sympathetic sort of person you see. I come from a whole family of unsympathetic people and it’s just something I can’t help. That’s not to say I don’t care for those who are unwell or I don’t worry about my loved ones. I just can’t gush over the sick and unwell like others can. I’m not a “Oh you poor thing, how can I help?” sort of person, I’m a “What do you need to help with the pain, can I get you anything?” sort of person. Unless it’s M, which is an entirely different matter. Kirsty has accepted this as who I am and doesn’t complain. She knows I will listen when she’s not feeling good and knows I will do my best to help anyway I can. I do try my hardest to offer as much sympathy as I can, but it doesn’t last for long. I’m not unkind to those who are ill, I just don’t know how to deal with it very well.
So I’ve been holding the fort here at home and trying to keep things as normal as they possibly can be for M. He is a boy who thrives with a routine and struggles when it’s broken. However I have to say, M has been a superstar, he’s such a good boy but solo parenting, whilst working full time and trying to keep up normality has drained me of all my energy. I truly take my hat off to all the single parents out there who do this all day every day. Not having my wing man to help keep M entertained whilst I cook dinner or to help with bedtime etc has been tough.
I don’t know what I would have done if I didn’t have the support of our family to help me out this week, they have all been amazing. Our wonderful friends also kept us company on Sunday, and we had so much fun taking our boys swimming. It was nice to see M playing with his new best buddy.
The worst part about not having Kirsty at home is not having her to talk to. Once M is in bed and the house it quiet, there is no one, just a quiet house. So having friends to keep me laughing and joking was amazing.
Kirsty was only in hospital for 3 days but it was 3 days too long for me. I’m so glad to have her home and settling back into our routine. She’s got to take it easy but we’re planning on having a nice relaxing weekend together as a family and catching up with friends.