Mummy Needs A Cuddle

My role as a mother is starting to change and I’m not sure I’m taking it very well.

Since my little Monkey has started toddling he has discovered his toys and loves to interact with them. I love watching this but he doesn’t want to play with Mummy as much now *all by myself lol*.

Before M was mobile he needed me to do everything for him. I was the one who transported him from place to place, chose his toys and played with him, but not now. He loves to toddle around the house from room to room, person to person. Picking up the toys that take his fancy and having a little chomp before moving onto the next item that catches his eye. He chooses the person he want to pick him up, before I chose who I wanted to hold him and when.

Mummy Needs A Cuddle - mytwomums.com

I’m pushing myself to allow him to be independent, but it’s so hard. All I want to do is scoop my baby up and cradle him in my arms, like I used to.

I almost broke down in tears whilst talking to my mum about it today. Some times I get quite jealous that family members get to have all the fun, then seek me out for the horrible bits, like wiping his mucky face or changing his dirty nappy. Don’t get me wrong I adore being his mummy and doing all these things but I don’t always want to be the bad guy, the party pooper.

Mummy Needs A Cuddle - mytwomums.com

My mum told me that I shouldn’t worry. She also sympathised with me about letting my baby find his independence and explained that all mothers go through this hard transition but no matter what, my baby boy will always need his mummy. I smiled at her and thought ‘she’s right’ then I realised that I still look to my mum for support and advice, even now, I do it without even thinking about it and I appreciate her so much.

I’m sure my role as a mother will continue to change throughout the year and I’m sure I’ll struggle each time but that’s normal right?

 

This Post Has 10 Comments

  1. Claire @ Bad Fiction Reply

    Be proud of yourself, your baba is confident enough to do all that – he clearly feels safe and secure and knows you’ve got his back which is why he will approach others. Well done you! xx

  2. lucy at dear beautiful Reply

    Ahhhh, I felt like this too. In fact I still sometimes get quite jealous that other people get to have so much fun with my little man, especially as his baby sister is still firmly in the ‘needing mummy all the time’ stage.
    But I can promise you one thing, the independent bit is tough at first, but it leads to the point where they CHOOSE to come back to you to give you special cuddles and kisses. And that TOTALLY makes up for it. x

  3. Heather Reply

    It’s hard isn’t it? My boy is 2 months younger than M but I’m starting to try to encourage him towards formula milk rather than breastfeeding, I know it’s for the right reasons but half of me just goes “waaaaaaaaah!” at losing that dependence on me. It’s a huge change as its the relationship I’ve had with him for his whole existence: I nourish him. And now I am at the beginning of the end of that. I simultaneously never want it to end and am ready to stop. Sigh. I loved it though.

  4. Katie @mummydaddyme Reply

    It’s so hard when they start to become more independant. On one hand you want to encourage them to spread their wings but at the same time it’s hard to see your little dependant baby grow into a toddler.
    Rest assured though, I can promise you Monkey will always need and want you for cuddles. At two Mads has come out of that stage and while she is still independant, she is super cuddly too. X

  5. Tee Mac Reply

    Great post 🙂 Loving the honesty and more difficult topics, mums x

    I completely get what you’re saying, I’m just doing my best to focus on how awesome E is and how well he’s doing. As said above, you should be so so proud that your gorgeous boy is so happy and confident – oh, and he will ALWAYS need you, you just wait 😉

  6. Ojo Henley Reply

    Oh its so horrible when they start to pull away! But take heed from the facts…..It will be a LONG time before you get to drink a fully hot cuppa. Also a long time until you get to eat with a full set of cutlery. And, as you say, you are still turning to your mum now! lol xx

  7. Shay Reply

    It is totally normal. I struggled both times when my babies started to become more independant (they are 2 & 3 now) but it just another thing that we, as parents, must learn to do. Try to focus on all the amazing things he can now do with his independance and the confidence that you have both given to him x

  8. Ruth (geekmummy) Reply

    I think we all go through this to a great or lesser extent, but as Lucy says it does make those moments when they CHOOSE to come to you all the sweeter. My firstborn, from the moment she could choose, has been a Daddy’s girl, but at the times that really matter, usually when she’s poorly, she wants me and only me. And I cherish those moments all the more because I know she has a choice.

  9. Franglaise Mummy Reply

    I remember going through this with L, but now aged 6 she’ll come to me to ask for cuddles and kisses and that makes up for it a million times over. As mentioned above it means you’ve done a good job as he’s independent and confident enough to go his own way. I know it hurts now but I’m sure he’ll soon start choosing to come back to you.

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